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Unicorn Meat

Unicorn Meat

Exalted Funeral Press

  • £21.99


Deep in the monster-haunted backwoods, Sunny Smiles Unicorn Farm lies in ruin.

The overseers vanished months ago. Gangs of feral children lurk in the shadows of a vast blood-stained factory. Knife season has come. Food is running out. Some rough beast slouches towards Bethlehem to be born.

Unicorn Meat is a southern gothic horror adventure inspired by LISA the Painful, True Detective, and Lord of the Flies, set in the decaying ruins of the last unicorn farm in the world. Play as carvergirls attempting to escape, or as adults unravelling the horror at the center of the Rochefocauld Company's great sin. Compatible with any number of old-school and old school-adjacent RPGs.

Features include:

  • System-agnostic adventure
  • Explore the farm, the factory, the swamp, and the caves beneath.
  • Carvergirl character class, new items and spells, spiritual combat and mutation mechanics
  • Support for one-shot and campaign-length games
  • Colorful NPCs and factions - Throw yourself right into the front of the brewing gang war
  • Streamlined card-based wilderness exploration system - Muck around in the swamp without making a mess
  • The MEAT ECONOMY - Food is money. Is that big knife worth going hungry for? Is a full meal worth the risk of a hunt?

Content Warning: child abuse, intense violence, gore, body horror, disease/starvation, implied assault, alcohol and drug abuse, religious trauma, and slavery.

Created by Dan D
Art by Rowan A. (Bottomless Sarcophagus, The Thawing Kingdom)
Coloring-page map Printout by Gus L (All Dead Generations, Prison of the Hated Pretender)

Editing by Jarrett Crader (MRC) and Fiona Geist (MRC)



108 pages, 5.5"x8.5", perfect bound book, full color cover and interiors. 


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